December 29, 2006

one of my dreams has always been to invent a language where it is grammatically correct to use any word as any part of speech. a noun can be used as a verb, so that, for example, it would be acceptable to soda someone out of their money. i don’t know what this would actually mean, but the poetic possibilities are endless.

the fifth episode of tilt is entitled “rivered.” unlike paroenetic, the origins of the word are pretty clear; the word obviously derives from the river card.

urbandictionary defines “rivered” as:

In “open” variations of poker such as Hold ‘Em or Stud, to have one’s strong hand beaten by an opponent whose stronger hand is only completed with the last face-up card, called “the river” or “Fifth Street;” or, to beat an opponent’s strong hand with the last face-up card.

there is also the variant form, “river’d” which nonsensically claims that “rivered” is related to “arrow’d.” (“What happens when you are shot by multiple arrows at one time, most likely out of somebody’s mouth. Word first made popular by Strongbad of Homestar Runner fame.”) while the feelings associated with the terms are probably similar, there is no linguistic reason to link the two words.

2 things of interest here:

1) “rivered” has almost the same meaning as being “up the creek.” or consider, “up the river,” being sent to prison. what does this say about man’s relationship with water? would “oceaned” have the same connotation?

2) there already is a “real” verb river, with both a trans. and intrans. form. to river something is “To wash (wool or sheep) in a river.” but it’s the intrans form that really stands out:

“To follow a river-like course”

isn’t this, essentially, what “rivered” means? one is still following a “river-like” course–it’s only the definition of “river” here that has changed (or, rather a parallel noun has emerged.) perhaps “river, v” is no longer rare as the OED claims

gotta love people heeding the call and bringing back the old verbs,




2 Responses to “rivered!”

  1. […] between the common parlance of the teeming, toiling American masses (i.e. decepticate, river-v) and the sublime, sub-prime jargon of academia (i.e. deseutude) whilst providing a(n) history of […]

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