We’re coming up on our first anniversary (with over 6 months of consistent publication! a recent lapse notwithstanding–butwithawhimper), so it seems like as good a time as any to take stock of this enterprise. Mostly, I’m excited to announce the upcoming return of L.P. Mandrake to the fold. Mandrake’s been off trying to save the world (or at least America, which Morrissey assures me is not the same thing) from the cozy confines of [Candidate’s name redacted to protect my feelings–it wasn’t Biden] Los Angeles headquarters. Thankfully, he’s come to the conclusion that a military junta is our only option, and whilst high-level discussions with the Texas National guards, he’s decided to resume posting treatises on our humble internet establishment.

While I’m excited for Mandrake’s return, we’re always looking to better our readers experience, and to expand the enterprise. Here, therefore, is my list of desideratum:

1) A full time food blogger. DH is still something of an amateur when it comes to fine cookery, having never advanced much beyond the position of line chef at his local Denny’s. That said, I’m an avid watcher of food related television programs, and a collector of culinary ephemera. I try to post as much as I can, but I’m sadly not equipped to debate the technical merits of whisks (bid whist is another story) or discuss the varying degrees of the “hotness” of peppers. (The hotness of Food Network chefs is again another story; Sandra Lee all the way.) Besides, what better captures our society’s needs then a blog devoted to words and food, the foundational elements of our social structure?

2 ) A hype blogger. We’ll call this position the Clap Your Hands Say Yeah!/Arctic Monkeys Chair in Media Phenomena. Typically, the stages go like this: young ____ gets a lot of hype for being great (perhaps too much), then critical debate shifts to be a discussion of hype. But the cycle doesn’t end there. People need to debate the media portrayal of the hype. Who are these party-poopers and why do they have it in for whatever hot young artist received so much attention? In a related vein, why do book critics feel the need to comment about the deluge of 9/11 novels every time another one is published? It would seem to me that the desire to express the inexpressible, and the need to make sense of the incomprehensible are self-evident. The bewilderment of critics amuses me. Trends in cultural commentary need to be exposed as much for their simplicity as for their potential accuracy.

3) An in house Medievalist. I can get my classics fill from El Cid or French articles about Ctesias or Porphyry. But who will shower us with articles about nuances of medieval Latin, who will while away our time with descriptions of legendary chivalry, and holy quests? And who will bring this to the Salad?

The wishlist is actually much longer, but these are our most glaring lacunae. I’d also like to have a regular guest blogger feature, where people from less popular blogs can post and make us feel better about our own stature as they bask in the YS glory, and where people with more popular blogs can bring readers.

If you’re interested in any of the positions, please fell free to indicate such in the comments. Alternatively, our offices always have a Ham radio operator standing by to answer any questions.