Knives

February 3, 2010

Once all the rage, have been gradually fazed out in favor of less damaging forms of cutlery. Knives have also been banned from all sorts of places, such as schools and airports. At one point, my brother was suspended for bringing a squirt gun to school, but this is a different story. He was also banned for bringing a pocket knife to school, which shows the womanly weakness that civilization has imposed upon barbaric masculinity.  Even worse than banning is the wholesale appropriation of the form of the knife into a plastic mold to produce pieces which resemble the products in form, but are insufficient for the fundamental functions which a knife must serve. Having lamented the decline of the knife, it is sufficient to merely tell you that knives have made a  great difference in my life.

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2 Responses to “Knives”


  1. Is some respected middlebrow journal now waging an assault on knives? For shame, America!

  2. theciceronian Says:

    This was rescued from the dustbin, mostly because of the strong biographical resemblances between Ari and Quintus Tullius Cicero.


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